The Agony and the Agony: Chronicling the Dallas Cowboys


Week One

On the heels of a season that witnessed the worst defense in franchise history, the Cowboys’ offseason featured the loss of their two best defensive players DeMarcus Ware (to free agency) and Sean Lee (to injury during, get this, non contact drills). In a bold move, the wizards of smart populating the Cowboys front office pulled a rabbit out of a hat, giving up draft picks to acquire retired–let me repeat that: retired–linebacker Rolando McClain, whose NFL career peaked the day he was drafted.

To literally add insult to injury, ESPN published a ranking of NFL head coaches by peer organizations that ranked Jason Garret thirtieth in the league.  Somewhere, Wade Phillips is smiling. Then there was the continuing saga that is Jerry Jones. Many could scarcely believe that Jones wisely passed up Johnny Manziel in the draft. Few were surprised, then, when Jones loudly proclaimed that he regretted selecting Notre Dame offensive lineman Zach Martin, stating that he was the only member of the organization that wanted to draft Manziel, and that his son and heir apparent, Stephen Jones, had to to talk him out of it.  This proves two things: 1) Jerry Jones is, in fact, senile (for further evidence, see here) 2) there is hope for the future.

But this past Sunday, the only thing Cowboys fans could have reasonably been hoping for after their demolition at the hands of the 49ers was a top-five draft pick come April. For a team that has won only one playoff game since 1996, the Cowboys have managed to sustain a remarkable amount of hype and attention.  Now that that veneer of respectability has faded away, the Cowboys organization has been exposed for what it is: a colossal, careening, irredeemable train wreck.

Things aren’t all bad, though. Rolando McClain did, after all, make eight tackles.

Next stop: Tennessee.

About Michael DiSiena

Michael is an attorney based in New York’s Capital Region, but if you asked him to represent you, his first advice would be to find another lawyer. Growing up surrounded by Giants, Knicks, and Yankees fans, he naturally has no affection for any New York sports teams. An astute observer of both sports and politics, he aspires to serve as offensive coordinator in the next presidential administration. He enjoys the finer things of life: art, literature, philosophy, classical music, and most anything else that won’t disappoint you by throwing an interception in the last seconds of an NFL game. I’m looking at you, Tony Romo.

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